So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
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I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
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I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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