I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
operation harelip BJ is a go
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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