And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
