he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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