I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
even my farts smell like vagina
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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