I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
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I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
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I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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