Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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