Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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