We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize