Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
do nipples grow back?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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