You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize