Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
