i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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