Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(505): View more from New Mexico

The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.

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(210): View more from Texas

I've decided to bang my pen-pal.

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(847): View more from Illinois

as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window

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(221): View more from

I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...

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(773): View more from Illinois

she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable

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(+79): View more from

Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight

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(847): View more from Illinois

My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?

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