i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Dick very happy bro
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
