Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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