I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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