your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Randomize
