Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
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Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
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Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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