OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
