today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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