who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
