508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I just saw a hot homeless man
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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