dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
