i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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