Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
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Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
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We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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