Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
