you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize