god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
