wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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