I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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