Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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