recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
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I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
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I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
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