So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
