Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
someone owes me an orgasm
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
