I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
