You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
My bed smells like the plague
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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