Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
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I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
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You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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