never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
