all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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