its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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