I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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