tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
