I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
