My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize