I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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