JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
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