What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize