new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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