My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize
