One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
You're like the curious george of whores
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize