Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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