Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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